A Scammer Reminded Me to be More Audacious
Updated: Aug 9
How after getting scammed, I learned that my lack of audacity may be the reason I am not where I desire to be in life.
I will stand by life being the greatest teacher. We can learn by reading and seeing, but nothing beats learning through doing/experiencing. Through experience, our mind and body connects to what we are supposed to be learning and the more heightened your emotions, the bigger the impact of the lesson. So when I got scammed recently, I was perturbed, but it lit a fire under my ass and reminded me “BITCH, you need more audacity!” I’ve said it before and I will say it again, anger is the greatest catalyst to change. Click the link below if you want to read more about my relationship with anger.
Pause ⏸️. What exactly is a scammer? Merriam Webster defines it as a person who commits or participates in a fraudulent scheme or operation. I define it as one who lacks credibility and accountability, but uses audacity and delusion to create trust with others for personal gain.
What is audacity? Merriam Webster defines it one who is intrepidly daring; or marked by originality or verve. I would like to add that audacity is someone who simply doesn’t let fear get in the way of their desires.
Meaning, a scammer requires audacity, but audacity does not require scamming.
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This particular individual was a successful scammer, because they not only believed in themselves, I believed in them too. I don’t want to give too much energy to the scammer, because this is more about me than them, but through this interaction, I saw myself a little clearer: I lack audacity. The lack of audacity may not be the only reason I am not where I desire to be, but I believe it plays a major role. I have allowed perfectionism and the fear of being perceived, to hinder my ability to act; therefore, creating a whole lotta talk and not a lot of action. And while it pains me to say that about myself, it is the truth.
You see, I am a certified life coach, but I have not coached any clients because I felt I needed to have proof of clients. Which is silly, because in order to show proof of clients, you have to first get clients. So for nearly 4 years, I have let the certification I paid good money for, go to waste. But a scammer, well… a scammer will create a persona through delusion mixed with audacity and not only believe it, but get others to believe it as well. If I have the accreditations, why am I counting myself out? Why do I not believe in myself? Why do I believe others won’t believe in my coaching abilities? Who said I have to be perfect in order to be capable? In order to get clients, I have to do the uncomfortable thing of simply trying and putting myself out there; perfection will come through practice and practice requires the audacity to begin. Clients can’t find me if they don’t know I exist. SMH! I have been shooting myself in the foot this entire time. 🤦🏾♀️
Another thing, I want to speak on stages as a storyteller and despite the stages I have spoken on since childhood and even in adulthood, I still feel I do not have the right to take up a stage. But how can I grow into the storyteller and speaker I want to be, without trying? I have to start small and be open to being awkward, so that I can learn and book the larger stages I desire. If the right stage fell into my lap today, I would likely panic, because I am not ready. I have to get ready and in order to get ready, I need some confidence with a side of audacity. Also, if God called me to do something, why would I doubt my abilities? Wouldn’t that mean I am doubting God?
Lastly, I want to write books, but I feel I have to find a publisher, an editor, and a literary agent. Where do I begin? Where do I start? And will I be taken seriously when I want to write different genres? Well for one, I have to start writing, which I have been doing. I also have to start sharing my writing for the right team of people to see, which is what I am doing now on Substack, but imagine if like the other two examples above, I did nothing? Imagine if I let myself say “I am not credible enough”, or “I am not a good enough writer”, and I chose to do nothing? Trying got me to nearly 500 subscribers in 6 months on Substack. Trying has strengthened my writing skills and style. Trying has connected me with other amazing writers. Trying has left my readers sending me kind messages that my writing has positively impacted them. Trying will create the opportunities I would like to call in.
Pause ⏸️. Yall know I love a song and a song that has helped me on days when the self doubt is loud, is Stronger by Sault. Specifically these two lines: “If I was not meant to fly, you wouldn’t have made the sky” and “God has His hands on my life, all I have to do is try”. Whew! So why am I not trying? God has my back!
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It is important to add that the thing a scammer typically lacks is a credible journey. A journey helps continue to foster trust with your audience, clients, customers, etc.. You don’t just wake up and become a doctor, artist, or athlete; those titles are earned through the journey of education, becoming, and trying. Think of an artist you’ve been a Day 1 fan of. You likely love them because you stood by them during their journey of becoming. That is how I feel about Beyoncé, Doechii and Jessie Reyez to name a few. And like them, I have a journey and credibility too, but I was lacking the audacity necessary to put myself out there; I let perfectionism and perceived perception take center stage instead. I’m supposed to be center stage, not my fears! Yet, there are people out here living their dream, simply because they have the audacity to scheme and defraud people. I am not by any means encouraging scamming, but I do want people (myself included, this is a self drag yall lol) to wake up and gain some audacity to be who God called them to be. If a scammer can, you certainly can and you will be rewarded by the kingdom of God; and as for them, their karma will come in due time, if they aren’t secretly dealing with it as we speak.
Pause ⏸️. Have you ever been to Cane’s? I believe they’re the epitome of audacity. They sell bland chicken strips a million different ways at a high price and charge you extra for the sauce, knowing the sauce is what makes their food edible. Yet, they’re still in business. That is audacious AF! The special sauce you and I need is, audacity. Period.
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While I could stay angry at that scammer for scamming me, I instead decided to transmute my anger into something bigger, way bigger than the ROI (Return on Investment) that they got from taking my money for the first and last time. The funny thing is, transmuting and alchemizing is nothing new to me. I have transmuted my pain since childhood and I want to help others on their journey of transmuting theirs. It may come easy to me now, but there are people out there who want to get to the part of their journey I’m currently in, and I would love to assist. I want to be the person I once needed, for others; I guess that is the big sister in me. I want to make sure people not only feel seen, but have the tools and confidence to overcome bullying, loneliness and low self esteem. I have overcome these through inner child work, ancestral veneration, and creating joy. We all have the tools to transmute, but I would like to guide you back to them, and yes I want to get paid for that. As strange as it feels to say, I am allowed to be compensated for my gifts and work.
How will I do that you ask? With some audacity, DUH! Lol, but I plan to do so in a multitude of ways, which includes, but is not limited to (because I don’t believe in limiting God): paid subscriptions here on Substack, paid keynote speaking opportunities across the world, being a guest on podcasts, and taking on paid coaching clients. Worst case scenario? Nothing happens and my life stays the same. Best case scenario? People pay me for my services and they are positively impacted. Even better case scenario? I am able to create the career I desire where my love of travel and helping others merge, allowing me to be compensated to see the world as a storyteller.
I am excited to begin this journey with you all (also a little scared because I am human) and to share a little bit more about my journey, in hopes that you are interested in becoming a paid subscriber, or booking a consultation for my speaking and coaching opportunities. To become a paid subscriber on Substack, click the subscriber button below, or click upgrade if you already are a subscriber. To book a consultation with me, click the “Book me here!” link to my website below.
Thank you for reading and engaging with me Substack family. Feel free to like, comment, and share with a friend you feel this message will resonate with. Just know that with each positive interaction, you’re reminding this little girl that she has purpose and she is worthy. Until next time. 🧚🏾♀️💕✨
Originally posted on Substack on June 29, 2026 - https://thebrianadionne.substack.com/p/a-scammer-reminded-me-to-be-more
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